Monday, March 29, 2010

What's Up With That? Edition

I have had morning sickness for three months now, with no accompanying pregnancy to give the daily gagging any depth, meaning or context in my life.  Every morning I wake up, and different smells set me off.  Sometimes it's coffee (actually, it's often coffee).  Sometimes it's a leftover aroma of spices from last night's dinner.  Sometimes it's peanut butter when I start to make the toddler's sandwich.  Basically, everyday smells set me off and I walk around the kitchen gagging.  A few times I've had to go running for the bathroom, but I've never actually gotten sick.  Just a lot of gagging.

So.....what's up with that?

I started using an ovulation kit this month in an effort to discover what's up with our failing procreative attempts over here at Casa de LazyBones.  Prior to this, I was using ovulation calendars to track my fertility, and so this month I used them both.  Calendar, meet kit.  Kit, meet calendar.  And right from the start: conflict!  The kit says the calendar is all wrong.  The calendar refuses to line up with the kit.  So those bitches are battling it out, and for now I'm just caught in the crossfire.

I guess we'll have to wait and see what's up with that.

My son has recently started telling me:  Mommy, I want baby AGAIN!  I want sisty!  I don't know where this is coming from, because I've never talked to him about having another baby.  He announced it one day from his carseat while I was driving, and has consistently repeated that he wants gul and sisty rather than boy or brother.  I don't even think he really understands what he's talking about, considering he's never around siblings.  It's both adorable, and slightly disconcerting.  I'm thinking I'll buy him a doll, and see if that's enough baby AGAIN for him.  Not sure who he thinks the first baby was!  I'm certain he doesn't understand that he was my baby, and that baby AGAIN, or sisty means another baby for me.  Weird, huh?

I wonder what's up with that.

I turned thirty four this weekend, and my entire immediate family came to visit (all seven of 'em!).  It was very low-key, and it was wonderful.  The weekend seemed to stretch out, long and lazy, and time seemed abundant.  Somehow I managed to clean (okay, tidy might be more accurate), go shopping at the Farmer's Market, take a family trip to an art show in another town, go for a long walk, read, write, shower and still have hours to relax with my family and enjoy dinner on Saturday, without ever feeling busy or hurried.  On Sunday, after everyone left town, my husband and I tried to take the toddler for a walk along the canal, but the wind was so strong we abandoned the effort and came home to nap instead.  I cuddled in a blanket and finished a novel, and then dozed until my son woke up.  Then we sat together on the loveseat in the bay windows and read stories all afternoon.  Time stretched out; it seemed we would never run out of daylight, and we enjoyed the sun streaming in on our shoulders while we lounged on piles of pillows.  What a gift, on my thirty fourth birthday, to spend it so unhurried, to feel time slowly spreading out around me like a wide open meadow, like a gift I can unwrap again and again.

I have no idea what's up with that, but rather than question it, I think I'll simply gratefully accept.

2 comments:

  1. Maybe Kit and Calendar fighting is causing the gaging? Your weekend sounds so warm and inviting and warm and inviting.

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  2. happy belated 34th! your day sounds like ultimate perfection to me :) i have no input on the kit v. calendar debate; sorry. go with the kit is my instinct, however.
    the whole gagging thing in the am; i hear you. i have had morning sickness since i was born & it sucks. the morning and i have a long history of conflict. i drink tea or coffee, and that's it till about 10.

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