LazyBones aka CoffeeBuzz: Prefers sitting to standing. Prefers lying down to sitting. Prefers daydreaming to almost anything. Requires coffee to achieve basic, everyday life tasks. Possesses an almost supernatural ability to chill. Moves at the speed of light for the amount of time it takes caffeine to travel throughout bloodstream, achieving monumental tasks such as: tidying living room, and starting the laundry. Resumes chilling immediately upon drug exiting the system. Waiting wistfully for the day when reading a book results in a clean house and mattress testers are finally paid what they are so clearly worth.
MoodyPants aka SuperSpouse: Possesses demon moods that have been known to escape the limits of the body and cast a dark shadow throughout the land. Attempts to harness said moods as weapon of warfare against rogue states currently ongoing. Ability to wither with a look. Alternately, to achieve more before breakfast than most people achieve in a month when the stars are properly aligned. Cooks like a five star chef, cleans like a maid on meth, and works harder than John Henry with a hammer in his hand. But when it's a full moon: watch out. You've been warned. Wishing for a handyman, a million dollars, or both, so he can take a well-deserved break.
Sun aka Storm: Small child who thus far has demonstrated inheritance of the maternal capacity for chillin' out, maxin', relaxin' all cool. Incapable of shootin' some b-ball outside of the school as of yet. As the toddler timetable continues to progress, be on the lookout for paternal traits to surface including extreme mood swings accompanied by intense emotional outbursts. Has already demonstrated capacity to surpass father in skills such as: bursting into tears for no apparent reason whatsoever, and winning arguments with a single word (see: MINE! also: NO!). Lover of cheese sticks, french toast, and those disgusting mandarin oranges that come in a can. Wants what he wants, when he wants it, which would be NOW!
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